Cold House Burning

by Camille Delean

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1.
Oversold and underfed Never so alive and dead Idle fever, so out of tune A light looms, sky out of reach How’d I ever get so weak Idle fever, I’m out of use Go further astray The pain you made alone is your fuel for the day It’s never over I’m here to stay Who would come here to fade? Idle fever, let’s make a move Threat of fire in a spark Threat of dawn in the dark Threat of fever in every room Go further astray The pain you made alone is your fuel for the day I got pretty far along Every place I up and fled Warmly settled in my head Idle fever despite a move Go further astray The pain you made alone is your fuel for the day
2.
04:17
You’re taking my sleep from me The day dawns and it hurts me Ahead, too early, too soon Are you afraid of your own dreams Of nothing as it seems, worried The day won’t wait for you I’m leaving the city Feels better already My worry’s got plenty of room Stop letting go of me, pulling I pull eternally, you’re blurry Who am I speaking to I love you endlessly, it’s lonely Ramble mindlessly, lonely Can’t wake myself You’re still in the city You’re settled and steady Your worry’s got plenty to do [You rest on your wreck How do you wake so early How do you wake so early How do you wake I’m sleeping Not catching enough And now I’m late for the day]
3.
I am afraid What do I say, I’ve never explained before Hide in the ground Hanging around, no need to close the door It’s only talking I never listen, I’m afraid of knowing Sheltering fear Here’s another name Will you let me stay, I’ve never stayed before Tomorrow might find I lose all the time I cannot thank you for It’s only dreaming I waited outside I was afraid of warming Stifling fear Nowhere is safe Afraid of everything I’ve ever seen before I go by the rules An easy fool, I’ve never played before It’s only cheating The winner’s the one afraid of feeling No-mercy fear It’s stifling here, swallowing fear They’re turning me away It’s nothing to praise, nothing to blame them for I flounder on land I do what I can, have you never been afraid before It’s all deceiving Go help another I’m afraid of needing Comforting fear It’s stifling here, comforting fear
4.
It’s medicine morning Look at the life we made It’s gonna be a fight all day I’m almost delighted No stalling A promise to life we made They gave me a pill to take It’s gonna be violent A chronic burning A dizzy yearning Stay hungry It’s a sweeter taste when you earn it Half-hearted warring A lazy warning The poor old things Looking for a lighter way [Can you feel anything? Running out of space To move in] Here on medicine morning I’m dragging the house awake Go give the world a shake It’s early, alive You’re lagging ah! You’re holding us all up They give you a name You gotta survive [Now you’re crushing yourself Am I blurry? Get it before it’s gone] A chronic burning A dizzy yearning Stay hungry It’s a sweeter taste when you earn it Half-hearted warring A lazy warning The poor old things Looking for a lighter way It’s gonna be violent [Can you feel anything? Now you’re crushing yourself Am I blurry? Get it before it’s gone Get it before it’s gone]
5.
My fate is all around me Lies waiting in the valleys all around me Pulling down We’re in for a long ride home Place my bets and wait a while She’s pulling down The valleys around Hang my dreams under the sun in late July Don’t let me freeze on a fault line Rocks shiver on the plane I don’t trust the ground Tread lightly! Think steady! Watch your footing around the lines Or you’re going down I walked thirty miles Don’t let me freeze under the sun in late July [Mid-summer The valleys around Don’t look up Do not trust the ground Thirty miles of valleys around Tread lightly Think steady Or you’re going down] The valleys around Hang my dreams under the sun in late July
6.
03:06
Keep my head down while Disasters accumulate I look around, I lucked out Faded tragedy stains How many years have gone? Have we been here long? Look around, eyes open for days Summer gazing The time must be wrong You said life would be long And no one would hurt me Trouble in the clouds Blurry light of day Guardian, night lookout Stay home with your babies How many years have gone? Have we been here long? Look around, eyes open for days Summer gazing The time must be wrong You said life would be long And no one would hurt me Eyes open for days Eyes open Have we been here long? Keep my head down while Disasters accumulate
7.
A wave moving in on A house I’ve been keeping When it swallows me blind Travel out of time And settle there I can see it in strangers Floating and anchored In footsteps behind They move out of time I have friends there I’m calm and I’m restless So careful and reckless One step out of line I fall out of time And I lay there Go fast it’s a wild one Eclipsing our own sun It follows me blind I run out of time And I live there I’m calm and I’m restless So careful and reckless One step out of line So careful and reckless
8.
Don’t go crazy on your friends Relax, be good, patience You’ve got a strange way of feeling that’s all Your own way of breathing Darkness with no home to live in How generous are you feeling Oh the weight of the mortals we are Halted, faulty wheel No grace, no way to feel Oh the weight of the mortals we are Kid you’re on the mend You’re gonna have to breathe in The world never waited at all While you housed a villain Darkness is late for evening Your lovers are all appearing Oh shame on the mortals we are Halted, faulty wheel No grace, no way to feel How heavy and haunted we are Do you see what I’m seeing? Can you carry the mortals we are?
9.
03:26
Rumours real or unfounded You can’t be caught, you steal You steal in vain It’s not them you’re hurting Go easy on the world it’s only turning A new alarm is sounded The fire escape reveals Your lucky day Here goes another journey Go easy on a world slowly burning A prayer and a holy man grounded A hollow forever resounding Go easy on a world only learning Stop looking for a reason you found it No road to and no way around it Go easy on a world only turning What is pain to a mountain What’s the wrong it feels Is it afraid? Oh, let’s comfort it
10.
Wishing a part for somebody I know Back from a lifetime with nothing to show South, where the story fades Wind-weathered, memory-stained Caught in a circle repeating Iced in and set with no feeling Lost in the space I carry around Found in the cool impossible sound Of silence embedded in all that I do I hear other places in you A walk on the land that saw you grow A burn in the sun that made you glow Took all I can from the hazy high Back to a place where down is the light The world as I learned it a blinding blue Buried a summer of you Buried a summer of you South, where the story fades South, where the story fades

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credits

released June 5, 2020

Camille Delean: vocals
Michael Feuerstack: guitar, bass, vocals, percussion, synth
Jeremy Gara: drums, additional piano
Mathieu Charbonneau: piano, synth
Philippe Charbonneau: vocals, synth
Joshua Zubot: violin
Adam Kinner: saxophone

All songs by Camille Delean
Published by New Habitat Songs (SOCAN)

Produced by Camille Delean and Michael Feuerstack
Recorded in Montréal, QC by Michael Feuerstack at Salad Feelings
Drums recorded by Dave Smith at Breakglass Studios
Mixed by Michael Feuerstack and Camille Delean
Mastered by Harris Newman at Grey Market

Photography by Camille Delean and Nathalie Delean
Design by Huot & Vallentin

E-Tron Rec., Hull QC
NHR-002/ETRC031

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Camille Delean Montreal, Québec

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